Opaque Lucidity

Slowdown

I mentioned here some time ago that I have the ability to see how many hits this site receives every day. I normally only check this statistic twice a month (the 15th and the 30th). Each month has been better than the month before, except for this month. This, I believe it due to two things. First, May is normally a very busy month for people with school ending, the weather getting nicer, etc.

Second, and more maddening on my part, is that many of my readers work for the same company in Louisville which will go unnamed. These gentleman had their Internet privileges taken away from them because of a couple people who couldn't seem to stay off of questionable sites. Instead of filtering content like most businesses, the inept IT guy just wanted everybody off, I guess. Dude, it's called Border Manager, it's made by Novell, it's not that expensive, and I will be glad to come over and install it for your sorry ass.

Sorry; had to get that out of the way early.

My Turn at the Pen

Before I started typing this entry, I had almost a full page mapped out concerning the President's speech last night. But I'm thinking about something else right now, something that I want to share. It has to do with two people whom I love dearly: Mark and Katie. They are two of the almost 14 nieces and nephews Kelli and I have and they graduated from high school on Sunday. Kelli and I attended the same high school as they; in fact, we were the first class to graduate in that same gym in 1989. It was still unifinshed that Spring so long ago and air conditioning was a long way off. I had recently enlisted in the Navy, although a shoulder injury earlier that year had forced me to change my rate (job) from Cryptological Technician to an unspecified rate in the Navy's Nuclear Power Program. Kelli and I were friends, but not close ones----that would come 18 months later when, as a newly minted Petty Officer, I would ask her out on a date as we stood in the front of the Kroger's here in Jeffersonville. There was still a Soviet Union, the first George Bush was President, I weighed less than 200 pounds, the Internet was called Arpanet and blah, blah, blah....it was a century ago.

I was thinking of all this as I sat there, listening to some big wig from the archdiocese give a short talk about nothing memorable. As is consistent with my giant ego, I began to think about what I would say were I in her shoes. Since I can't inflict my thoughts upon the class of 2004, I will inflict them on you:

"I am the first of many graduation speakers for most of you. You will have one when you graduate from college, or grad school, or any military school you attend. You will then suffer through your children's graduations and, hopefully, their children. While I am certainly not the best of commencement speakers, my hope is that I will not be the worst. I will try to be the shortest.

You enter into a world that is increasingly cynical and base. There are those who say that to get ahead in life today that you must be able to deny that part of your humanity that is compassionate and caring. After all, you may someday be the person who sends a subordinate's job to India.

In some ways those people are right. To those realists, and to you, I say that anything which makes you deny the moral certainties that I hope this school has taught you is not worthy of pursuit. The world is full of men and women who have sold their souls for the riches of this world and are still poor in all the ways that matter. Don't be one of them. In the end, all that any of us has is our character.

There are those who say that we are living in an increasingly internationalized world that does not respect political boundries. While this is certainly true, I hope you will always remember that you are Americans. Some of you will travel the world, either for business, for pleasure, or in defense of this nation. No matter the reason for your travels, know that you represent not just yourself but your country, and it is the greatest nation the world has ever known. Never be ashamed of it, or what others think of it. There is a distinct American culture which you are a part of; don't deny it.

Finally, love your family. I'm not talking about just your biological family, but those who, in the course of your life, you will come to love as family. In tough times, when things matter the most, they are the people who you will be able to count on the most. Be loyal to them, even if it means making tough, painful and costly decisions. And, even if it feels awkward, tell them that you love them.

Thank you for your time and attention. Congratulations."

Sick

I've been slow posting the last couple days because I've been somewhat under the weather. I stayed home from work today, something I am loathe to do since it dumps so much work on the other three people in my department. I feel guilty when I call in sick; I don't know if this means I have a good work ethic or I feel too much guilt about everything.

One thing I will not feel guilty about is not going to see the film "The Day After Tomorrow". I could smell a stinker coming on about two years ago, when Art Bell announced that he and Whitley Striber's book "The Coming Global Superstorm" was being made into a film. Art and Whitley writing a book on weather science is like me writing a book on brain surgery. Of course, facts are of little consequence to those involved with the environmental movement. As many most liberal causes, their reasoning is rooted in fear and jealousy (you're going to die if rich whitey American doesn't get rid of his SUV). I was surprised to see this in America's sixth grade newspaper, USA Today. My God, a commentary that states facts!!! What will they think of next?

A Little Respect

Last week, Kelli and I received an invitation to a Memorial Day party. I've been struggling with the idea of going, probably spending more time thinking about it than I should. But taking the decision to not attend the party has made me realize, more than ever, what I really require in a friendship.

I've written here before about how seriously I take my friendships. To me, there is a distinct difference between an aquaintance and a friend. In my opinion, many people cheapen the term "friend" by considering everyone they share a beer or conversation with a friend. Almost without exception, these people end up getting burned by their "friends". But they keep going back again and again, which probably speaks to a certain desperation. But I digress.

I have never considered the host of this party a friend. My association with him is on a professional level at best. But I have come to realize that everyone he comes into contact with is suddenly a "friend", a "pal", a "buddy" or even a "brother". As I'm fond of saying, words mean things. If everyone's a friend, then pretty soon the word means nothing. Thus, attending his party is, to him at least, tacit admission that I am some kind of "friend". I'm not, at least to my way of thinking, so our attendance would be sort of a lie by presence.

There is something else to consider. To some people, social interaction is tacit approval of their behavior. If you go to their house or hang out with them, then they believe that whatever they're doing in public is OK. And the larger that crowd, the deeper the approval must be.

Now, before you consider me some sort of judgemental asshole, let me explain. I don't really care what people do behind closed doors. But what I do care about is how those same people act in public and how they treat me and the people I care about. In that way, I am VERY judgemental. Also, I give my family (not just the people I am biologically related to or people who I am related to by marriage; there are people who I consider family because I have known them most of my life or been through tough times with them) more leeway on these issues. Sorry, but that's the way it is. I guess it all comes down to respect---if you treat me with respect and you are worthy of respect, then I respect you. If I respect you, then you are more likely to be a friend of mine. If I don't respect you for whatever reason, then you don't stand a chance. And, for the record, respect has nothing to do with age, job, sex, political beliefs, sexual preference or finances. It has to do with honesty, loyalty and compassion.

You might be thinking that I've spent much too much time on this. Maybe you're right. But I've finally matured enough to see that all that matters in the end is honor, honesty, loyalty and love. Everything else is a facade and life is too short to spend with people who are all facade and no substance.

Change the World

There is a debate raging in Louisville over an area called the Highlands. For those of you reading this in Dallas, the area of which I speak is much like Lower Greenville. It is what is known as a "mixed area"; that is, there are businesses intermixed with private homes. The area has been this way for more than a generation, but it has become an increasingly popular hangout over the past decade.

Here's the problem: many of the old inhabitants of the neighborhood are angry over the drunks, parking, vandalism and other social ills that come with large, young crowds. They are right when they say that there needs to be more parking and police patrols. Also, making bars close at 2AM instead of 4AM might not be a bad idea. All of these things are reasonable responses to the situation.

But there is something else at work here. If you move into a mixed use neighborhood, shouldn't you expect that there will be some late night foot traffic, early morning dumpster emptying and first-light food delivery? I know the area has grown in recent years, but anyone with a little bit of intelligence
knows that populations grow over time and that some expansion is inevitable.

The truth of the matter, as I see it, is that the fighters in this battle are suffereing from what I like to call Redford/Denver Syndrome, named after Robert Redford and John Denver. People who suffer from this condition will move to an area (wilderness or otherwise), praise it for its gradeur and then complain when other people do the same thing. It's sort of like saying, "Too bad, Jack; I've got mine. Go get yours somewhere else."

If you want peace and quiet, go live in a cookie cutter house in the suburbs with all the other soccer parents and their broods. People live in downtown areas because they are mostly older, unique and give you a nice break from the drab sameness of the Levitowns which surround us. Please, please, please don't move in and try to make it like everyplace else.